First things first: There is no such thing as a bad Monogatari girl. All girls are best girls! (Even Kaiki…)
That being said, with so much waifu material QT3.14s crammed into one series it’s hard to choose one of them as the best especially as new seasons are released and the girls shift up and down the rankings. Depending on your tastes, maybe you may fancy one of the lolis (hey we’re not judging) or the older peers of Ararararagi-san (sorry we bit our tongue.)
Anyways these rankings will continuously be updated as new seasons come out. Right now they are accurate as of Koyomimonogatari (the ONA that came out via app spring of 2016.)
They’re separated into three tiers.
Let’s start from the top.
There’s no separation between the two girls in this tier. In a constant struggle, like the ying and the yang, we had to place both of them for a tie at 1st and 2nd place.
Ever since she was properly introduced in Nisemonogatari, Shinobu aka Kiss-Shot-Acerola-Heart-Under-Blade, the legendary vampire aberration quickly shot up the best girl rankings. By the end of Monogatari second season she firmly established herself as a league above the rest (excluding the next girl on this list, her equal)
Having gone from a mute, emo vampire in Bake to prideful, cute sidekick to her lifelong partner, Araragi — bound till death in a bond stronger than any of the other girls in the series — our donut queen rightfully claimed the throne at the top.
Accurate depiction of us whenever Shinobu shows up in a scene:
Best Arc: Mayoi Jiangshi
Crab may have something to say about Shinobu. Our tsundere goddess comes through with the wittiest dialogue out of all the characters in the series, playfully berating our protagonist Araragi with such mastery it easily allows her to take over any scene she appears in.
Gahara-san hasn’t been the focus of the series in its most recent seasons, yet her presence is always felt and her scenes memorable purely thanks to her force of personality. From declaring she’d kill Araragi and herself if she ever catches him cheating, to threatening him with stationary, to telling him unabashedly she’d leave him if someone more qualified came by… what’s not to love?
Seriously look at how perfect she is.
Best Arc: Hitagi End
The Gaen child really made a name for herself in Owarimonogatari. Enough to come knocking on the door of the 2 best girls in the highest tier. Her 1v1 standoff vs Shinobu which she actually won (!) solidified her rankings in the upper echelons.
So when you combine that with her constant, aggressive teasing of Araragi (enough to make any normal man succumb to temptation) and her athletic, short haired tomboy persona (very underrated), and her quick thinking energetic personality, and a stimulating body to say the least… you get Monkey at 3rd place.
And of course we have this scene…
Best Arc: Shinobu Mail
Some will find this ranking too low for arguably one of the most important characters in the series — Araragi’s mentor and first true crush but really 4th place as best Monogatari girl is not bad at all.
Hanekawa really came to her own during the Tsubasa Tiger arc in Second Season and since then she’s always been hovering near the top of this list. We prefer short haired, dual colored hair Hanekawa to braids and glasses Hanekawa and her Neko form over all.
She’s just too cute with those cat ears to place her anywhere lower.
And seeing her cry always breaks our heart.
Best Arc: Tsubasa Tiger
Our favorite loli has some of the most memorable quotes in the entire series:
“The courage to… lie to your lover/betray your comrades/be a lazy bum/etc.”
“Huh, love? Yes I know love. They were selling it down at the convenience store for 286 yen.”
“Sorry, I stuttered. / Sorry, I bit my tongue.”
But her backstory is what kills us. A little girl sets out by herself to visit her mother on mother’s day, having forgotten what her face even looks like. Anxious and lost, she crosses a street and dies in a truck accident, then having been turned into a ghost oddity, perpetually lost and looking for her mother.
We loved Hachikuji ever since we first met her in Bake and her dysfunctional relationship with Koyomi was always a pleasure to watch.
Her farewell in Second Season destroyed us.
Best Arc: Shinobu Time
6.The Fire Sisters
The fire sisters come together in a package as heroes of justice so who are we to split them up? Someone is going to be platinum mad at us!
Karen and Tsukihi starred in generally what is considered one of the weaker Monogatari seasons (Nise) but the direction the show took isn’t necessarily there fault so we can’t blame them.
Karen’s eagerness to fight for justice and defend what is right along with Tsukihi’s short-tempered nature and their kinda incestuous relationship with their brother, Koyomi (…somehow the show makes it work) make for memorable moments that makes us think “only in Japan” like the “toothbrush” scene in Nise or Araragi bathing with Tsukihi in Tsuki.
Best Arc: Karen Bee
Great But Not As Great Tier
7. Nadeko Sengoku
Oh how the mighty have fallen. Nadeko up to Nise was a cute character… but not much else. In Second Season we got a look into her personal world and her own sense of disgust at her cuteness and how unhinged she really was which developed her personality but also turned her into a sort of villainous character for the series which dropped her down the rankings.
Don’t get us wrong, if we solely judjed based on cuteness, Nadeko would come in first guaranteed but we can’t overlook the fact that she tried to kill the queen Shinobu and almost succeeded if it wasn’t for everyone’s favorite con artist who came to save the day.
Best Arc: Nadeko Medusa
Peace, Peace. Yaaayyyy.
Isn’t it crazy how such a great character is last on this list? Let it be a testament to the greatness of the Monogatari series.
An incredibly well done character design with a colorful costume and a distinctive reserved yet hilarious personality. Her unlimited rulebook saves Araragi a handful of times and the snowball sequence vs Shinobu was a kawaii battle for the ages.
Best Arc: Tsukimonogatari
What else is there to say? If you watch Monogatari there’s a 100% chance you’ll fall in love with at least one of the girls, take our word for it. Witty dialogue and great character development make each of them easy to love and the series a joy to watch (and rewatch) over and over again.
Now let us know what you think and who your favorite is!